Friday, August 12, 2011

Twitter Etiquette: The Do's and Don'ts to public tweeting (or) why some people should only be allowed to use snail mail

Hi friends,

Hope you're all having a wonderful day!

I thought I would take a few minutes to share some things with you all that has truly bothered me today.  As you know, today is Friday and that means "#Follow Friday" in the twitter world.  Honestly, Im SO grateful that each of you takes the time to actually sit down and mention me, and try to warn your other followers just what they are about to get themselves into when they click that follow @theonlyjgrant button ;)  BUT at the same time I think #FF has lost its true meaning. WHO truly does ANYTHING other than say "thank you" to the person who sent it? Do you really follow any of them?  Wouldn't you get more bang for your buck by listing ONE person at a time and actually tell me WHY I should follow them? hmmmmm   things to ponder!


And without further delay, please allow me to hop up on my Twitter soap box and clear up a few things for those who seem to be confused.....

Jay's first twitter issue: Using Twitter as a means to sell/spam/beg for money etc etc, anything you feel the need to push on your followers....

There are hundreds of social media outlets out there today.  Personally, I don't think twitter is the place to come to "PUSH" your products.  We call that SPAM.  and we ALL know how annoying the "BOTS" are.  If you are an unsigned music artist, and you want your followers to see your goods, try this: Put your shit on youtube and pray for Ellen to find it like so many others before you have done.  Give us something to check out FOR FREE with the option to buy.  and more importantly, don't hound ANYONE to buy it.  NOT COOL!  I assure you, I follow MANY indie artists and you bet your ass that if I am suggesting them, its because I like their music and I believe in them.  NOT because I am gaining anything from it.  Lee Gibson is a perfect example.  Lee has NEVER asked me to push his music.  He's NEVER asked me to buy ANY of it.  If you see me mention Lee or his music, Its because I like the song and I think you will too!  I already know that I can pop on over to Itunes and buy it.  Trust me, I own (and have paid for) ALL of his available music.

I bring this up because I have actually had an artist POINT OUT the fact that they KNEW I hadn't bought any of their stuff because they were watching the sales from Itunes and it hadn't changed.  TO THE ARTIST: your numbers didn't change because I could tell from the samples that I didn't like the music.  The next time you try to push it on me, I will be SURE to point out the fact that you sound like a dying cat and I KNOW why you're not signed to a label. YOU SUCK (that IS my opinion)   PS, when a REAL industry person tries to tell you that your methods of tweeting and pushing your music are only causing your followers to get pissed and feel uncomfortable, you should listen!  not get cocky!  The fact that you have any followers left is beyond me!  AND, if you're having to tweet your "sales" over and over and over all day, that's probably a good indication that nobody wants it anyway #justSaying (enjoy the hash-tag)



And now for my BIG issue of the day! INAPPROPRIATE tweeting:

There are a couple of words you need to know before we go further.  The first one is OBLIGATION
Dictionary.com defines obligation as this: ob.li.ga.tion; (noun) Something by which a person is bound or obliged to do certain things, and which arises out of a sense of duty or results from custom, law, etc...

the next word needs to be looked up at urbandictionary.com  GHERM; someone who slavishly follows and sucks up to a celebrity. A fan to excessive degree. Usually applied to one who makes people uncomfortable by their adoration

YOU DO NOT EVER WANT TO BE A GHERM!

Now before I go further, Let me say this; If you think that I am talking about you here, chances are, you might be right.  I assure you I am NOT doing it to be ugly or hateful, I am simply trying to help you out.  ALSO, This is NOT something thats happened due to ONE person  Trust me, I have a few.  This whole blog, in fact, Is coming from a conversation I had earlier today with a well known actress about an incident yesterday involving her, a gherm, and another well known actor. (names WILL be changed to protect the innocent) :D

Name dropping on twitter is NEVER ok!!!  there is, however, appropriate ways to say hello.  Lets look at a couple of examples.....

NOT OK-

"hey reba, can I get a follow? you follow (@name) and I want you to follow me" (read; OBLIGATION)

"hey Dolly, can you follow me back PLZ, I'm a friend of (@name) they will tell you i'm good"

THIS IS TOTALLY OK

"Hey Kenny, just wanted to say HI!  (@name) told me I should follow you and they have good taste.  Nice to meet you"

"any friend of @name's is a friend of mine! look forward to reading your tweets in my timeline"

"@name told me to follow and I always listen!"


begging for a follow is NEVER ok- celebrity or not.   asking for a retweet is never ok- this causes one of two things.  It causes them to completely ignore you out of fear of opening a flood gate, or it makes them feel obligated to follow you.....NOBODY wants to feel obligated.  You think you're having a hard time getting their attention, imagine how you will feel once they UNFOLLOW you after you've annoyed the shit out of their timeline and BLOWN UP their direct message box.  NEVER COOL

For years, Celebrities have wanted a way to SAFELY connect with their fans.  Twitter has shown to be an amazing outlet for that.  but just like there is crazy people in the real world, there are crazy people on twitter.  and acting like this is WHY a lot of celebs DONT follow you back and DONT tweet you   its like opening Pandora's Box.

Many of you know my background.  Let me give you some words of advice on behalf of those in the spotlight.  (this coming from someone who hasn't been in the spotlight, but stood beside it)  \

If you want to "friend" your favorite celebrity, YOU MUST TREAT THEM LIKE ANY OTHER NORMAL HUMAN   -because they are!  If you want their attention, say hi to them, be funny with them, be short and sweet. Leave them enough room to "quote" retweet you, and make sure its something that they can put in their timeline.  I promise you that an Oak Ridge Boy would NEVER retweet a tweet with the words "motha fukka" in it.  use common sense.  take that shit over to Flavor Flavs timeline.  Use your brain :)


At the end of the day, the friendships I have with these people are SO much better than ANY autograph you could ever get.  It might surprise you to know, Ive never asked for a follow back or a retweet from any of these people.  and in return, you would be surprised JUST how many of them not only follow me, but we have exchanged phone numbers and actually text back and forth as much as we tweet each other.  The trust that they have given me and the friendships I have made, FAR outweigh ANY autograph, random tweet or cyber "high-five" I could ever get.  and how have I made these friendships, SIMPLE   I've talked to them as friends   NOT as "stars"  And I've never hounded them.


To close this out, I ask ONE thing of you..... PLEASE do NOT use my name or ANYONE else's name to gain the attention of ANYONE.  It makes me feel uncomfortable and also puts me on the spot.  One place I HATE to be.  If you want to include me in saying hello, do that.  Say hi, tell them I told you to follow, and let it go.  DO NOT annoy these people and throw my name into the fire.  I WILL call you out on it. Not only will it get you unfollowed by me, you can bet your sweet ass that they will have a DM waiting on them from me telling them how pissed I am that you used my name to get their attention.


Ok, I'm off the soap box now, and I feel much better.  I hope this doesn't offend anyone because thats NOT my intentions.....on the other hand, if you ARE offended, chances are you're a gherm anyway.   SHAME ON YOU!   Tweet yall later!


4 comments:

  1. Yes! Yes to all of it! Can't tell you how irritating I find the #FF when it is followed by ten names with no explanation at all! I mention more than one but I try and say why you should follow them.
    I spoke to you earlier about the fact that I unfollowed someone due to them excessively tweeting (spamming) people including me about their music. Whether it's good or not, if you shove it down my throat I'm always going to like it less than if I get the chance to let it move me.
    I have to admit I have been known to name drop in the past. Smack me on the hand! But never in the way you refer to, more in a omg guess who just tweeted me! kind of way :)
    I'm so glad you started this blog, I really enjoy reading it, thanks

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  2. Just remembered, another tweet I hate to see: Hey @name please RT if you love your fans! Seriously? Emotional blackmail much? I mean this is a lose/lose for the celeb and it is the number one thing I hate to see fans doing to people they supposedly 'love'. Ooh, which reminds me, don't let me get started on 'loving' someone you have never met, never spoken to and have no idea about what they are truly like! I 'love' peoples acting, or musical ability, but the person? Never met them so don't know how I feel about them! Oops, i guess I did get started on that one ddn't I? Sorry :)

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  3. lol OMG guess who tweeted me tweets are adorable I love it when I get them (DC fans) and Im sure celebs feel the same way I ADORE you and you know that!! xoxo Jay

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  4. Jay, I love that you have a blog! I will admit I am guilty of the #ff thing but I saw something about that before so I changed the way I do#ffs now (yes I was and still am an uninformed twitter virgin). As for being a gherm, you are irressitable and I cant control myself lol muah

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